Many of you who know my family personally, you may already have lived this story. For those of you who do not know myself in everyday life and have not had the chance to meet me, may not. Either way let us go back to when I first wanted to have children before my son came because I think this story is so incredibly important. It really has fueled a lot to why I blog now.
At the age of 23 I was faced with a horrid decision to choose to never have my own children. I had for years been battling cancers in my "lady parts" and was faced with the reality it just may never happen. I was in such a horrific place in my life because it was my ultimate dream to one day carry and have my own children ( yes, I know I could have adopted). My life just had not taken that road in stead it was a mess of failed relationship attempts, several serious operations and health complications really preventing the right time to have a child. I was in no condition to conceive on my own and was faced with the tough decision to in fact schedule a hysterectomy. As I sat in the Doctors office I remember thinking this was it, I was going to be left with an empty place. After discussing this with my doctor we both felt that at the time insemination would in fact help balance my hormone levels to help with some of the "lady problems" I was having.
I would love to say that road was easy and fun and end the story right there. But it's a blog come on! We tried for one and a half years to have a child. I had a miscarry and an atopic pregnancy which landed myself with serious complications and almost death into the hospital. After that I was shaken my relationship had taken its toll and we parted ways. I had one last chance and could not decide if I should risk another try on my own. At this point these treatments and injections were $8,000 and straining my job, life, relationships and my emotions. I gave it one last attempt unable to give up knowing the uncertainty and probability I would be a single mom. After trying again and waiting the allotted time, I went back, was examine and told it was negative. I was devastated and just seemed to walk away from the idea. My brother was flying in from deployment from Iraq and I flew out to see him. Life continued as normal for months. It wasn't until one day a co-worker came up randomly and said they had a dream I was pregnant. Seriously! I had not told anyone about my failed attempt because I was sure it would fail. That night all I kept thinking about was this comment and thinking wow it has been a while since any lady gift graced my presence (ha). Yes you guessed in a few days later I had this wonderful picture below of what is now my son Mac.
This pregnancy took its toll on my body and went from rough to serious in a very short time. He decided to give my body havoc at every turn and I was constantly in the hospital. At 24 weeksI was rushed to the hospital because what I though was just cramping ended up being pre-term labor. At 24 weeks Mclachlan would have been a severe premature baby with little to no lung development. I immediately was given medication to stop the contractions. When this wasn’t working I was strapped and prepared to be Mercy Flighted to Children’s Hospital. I couldn't get a hold of anyone, they were all stuck at work. As I was getting ready to leave, my family finally arrived only to be told I was probably going to deliver little Mac on the flight. A flight that took only 19 minutes to make would take them 2 hours to drive. He had one shot for his lungs to develop and that was it.
As I am sure they flew as fast as they could to get to buffalo. My brother was flown in from Iraq to be by my side along with my family. Like I said it was a huge scare and something I cannot ever put into words. Except to say we fought for Mac's life that day. I arrived safely and him unborn, luckily.
After this I was put on high risk. I went to the doctors office every other day for monitoring.
On June 27th, 2009 this little bundle of joy graced his presence one day before my original due date. This has to be my favorite photo above, of his birth, we all call it the I'm A-ok photo.
Through the years, I/we have been blessed with this little Mr. Mr. Blessed with extended families that call him theirs and friends who have surrounded him with love, gifts and support. We have all shared, even if it hasn't always been fun, the ups, the downs, the laughs, the cries together forming a family unit I dreamed of having. He will continue to grow and achieve thanks to so many of the people in his life and could not function without any of you! Let me show you some photos through his years so far because it truly is a miracle he is here! Trust me you have no idea what this little guy has battled and made it through. This was his first birthday above.
Second birthday :O)
Third birthday, and yes he still LOVES chameleons!
Fourth Birthday~ last Friday.
I can still remember his little kicks and him moving around in my belly. I can remember picking out your name. I can remember his very first cry and what he looked like in his crib. I remember him "cherping" while he drank a bottle. And now he can name his colors, shapes, is potty trained, says his numbers and 123s. He is my little man, my greatest and best life's accomplishment. Thank you all for sharing in this gift we have and seeing him develop via my blog!